


Not always there

by Lanessa29



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Angst, F/M, Gen, Mentions of Blood, One-Shot, based on sakura-rose12's comic, might turn into two-shot if you'll like it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-21
Updated: 2015-10-27
Packaged: 2018-04-27 10:18:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,536
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5044552
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lanessa29/pseuds/Lanessa29
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Being with her didn't mean he could always save her. There were times when he couldn't do a thing... Only watch.<br/>Chat wasn't going to accept this.</p><p>based on sakura-rose12's wonderful angsty comic on tumblr</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [sakura-rose12](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=sakura-rose12).



The time has come for the final battle.

Ladybug and Chat Noir finally managed to find Hawk Moth's hideout by monitoring where all the black akuma butterflies came from. The room was empty, save for pure white butterflies covering whole floor. They were cautious not to make any noise and to not step on butterflies. After all, in this form they were harmless. Defenseless. It wasn't their fault they were being used to create bad Akumas, and both Ladybug and Chat Noir didn't wanted to hurt them.

It was hard for Lady to move around the room. After the huge circular window got covered it was too dark for her to see properly. Thankfully, Chat Noir with his super night vision was there with her, ready to help her, ready to save her. After all those years it still annoyed her that Chat was willing to do anything for her safety, even sacrifice himself. She wanted him to be more selfish, to care about his own safety. She did know it was impossible. After all those years working as partners, Chat's cheesy pick-up lines and a few times he nearly died trying to protect his precious Lady, Marinette accepted the fact that Chat Noir was helplessly in love with her. It hurt her to see him so broken after rejecting him so many times. Especially after that one time when he was so serious about his feelings, the first time he openly admited he loved her.

She grew to love him, yes. But only as a precious friend, the best partner in fighting crime. Her heart still belonged to Adrien. Marinette managed to befriend him, they worked really good as friends. She never confessed to him, too afraid of being rejected, too afraid to destroy friendship bonds they created. For the time begin, she was content with how the things were.

Suddenly, Ladybug felt Chat's warm hand on her wrist as he drew her to his side. She wanted to complain, tell him it wasn't good time for flirting. A mere second later the place where she was previously standing was on fire. Chat had to see something in the dark and saved her. Yet again.

They heard a squeak of a metal as the window was being opened, daylight creeping into the room, waking all the white butterflies up. All started flying around them, covering whole room from their sight. Not even Chat's enhanced eyes could see past them. They stood side by side, preparing for an attack.

"I see you have found me, Ladybug, Chat Noir. It's a pleasure to finally meet you in person" suddenly, the butterflies flew away, almost up to the celling. Among those few who remained around them, appeared a person. Tall, lean man in dark purple costume with a gray mask covering almost his whole face had a confident smirk placed on his lips. His eyes holded no fear. Rather than that, his eyes were proud, victorious.

"Hawk Moth! This is the end! You won't create Akumas anymore!" Ladybug shouted, getting ready for their, hopefully, last battle. Chat said nothing, his eyes were scanning the room, looking for any threats.

White butterflies flying around them weren't helping.

"Oh, I have no need in creating them anymore. Now, you're here, and I myself shall take the Miraculous from you." a butterfly sat on Hawk Moth's hand. In mere seconds white got replaced by pure black, the butterfly was shining with dark purple light. As it rose from man's hand, more butterflies started changing it's colours. More and more, only the butterflies above them still had white wings. Not Ladybug nor Chat Noir have ever seen such an amout of akuma butterflies.

This is going to be a hard fight...

 

* * *

 

As it turned out, Hawk Moth's power wasn't limited to creating Akumas only. His butterflies were having different skills as well. They could work as a tiny bombs. They could create fire. They could froze them. And they all looked the same. It was almost impossible to avoid them, and it seemed that Hawk Moth still had lots of them. It could be a never ending battle for their lives, if it wasn't for them being humans. They were tired. Minds weren't as sharp as they're supposed to be in a fight. They had to avoid the butterflies, come up with a way to defeat them and then to defeat Hawk Moth himself.

Ladybug hissed loudly when one of the butterflies exploded next to her and she was too slow to avoid it in time. The heat of the explosion hit her skin, some fragments of fractured floor cut her costume and scrached her leg. It did hurt, but it wasn't a bruise she couldn't fight with. Chat must had heard her hiss, as he visibly started to do his best to join her. Damn him and his hearing.

A butterfly approached her at an enormous speed. Ladybug twisted her yo yo and hit it, barerly making it in time. Second later, Chat's staff flew just above her arm and hit another butterfly, which sneaked behind her. She could see his face covered in sweat, hear his heavy breathing. He was out of strenght as well. It was a miracle they were still in their superhero-mode, they were using their Miraculous for such a long time, and that fight wasn't helping their kwamis to keep up their powers for sure. They needed to defeat Hawk Moth. Quick.

Both without a word jumped towards their foe, trying to get as near as possible. Dodging and beating those butterflies which came up to their sight. They were getting close. So close. Only few more steps and Ladybug's yo yo would reach the man...

She grabbed her weapon and aimed. Marinette knew she had only one chance. Praying for her good luck to not no leave her now she took one more step...

Suddenly a butterfly appeared before her eyes and blew up. The shockwave hit her and send backwards. Ladybug felt her body crashing on the wall and falling to the ground. A shattered glass showered around her, she must have broke the window. The last sound she heard was Chat's voice, screaming her name.

Everything became black.

 

* * *

 

Time froze.

It looked kind of like a really badly made slow motion in a movie. The blow hit Chat too, but only caused him to lose his balance. He was in perfect position to see as his Lady flew back pushed by the outburst, hit the glass and fell to the ground. He heard his own voice screaming her name, rage and helplessness filling his mind. All butterflies seemed to stop in their tracks to let him pass. Chat dropped to his knees, brushing Lady's dark hair from her face. There was blood covering her temple. Her breath was shallow.

"M-my Lady..." Chat took girl's fragile body into his arms. For a girl so strong she was so light.

"H-hey..." sob clenched Chat's throat "Wake up!" he cupped girl's face, her skin was so pale. _It's your fault_ he heard a voice in his head say. _You aren't strong enough to protect her. You're too slow, too weak._ He was weak. He was slow. He was unable to protect the girl he loved the most.

Chat's tears fell onto Ladybug's cheek as he held her in his arms.

"Open your eyes" he shook her, almost hoping it would help her regain consciousness. "Please... I need you Ladybug... Open you eyes" her face became blurry when his own eyes bursted with tears. His cat ears quivered when he heard Hawk Moth's steps. By instinct Chat shielded Lady's body with his own.

"Look what you have done, Chat Noir." No, no, _no._ It wasn't him who hurt his Lady. It was Hawk Moth's fault. All of this was his fault.

"Stay away! Don't touch her!" Chat screamed on top of his lungs, face wet from tears.

"Oh no. I won't." Hawk Moth smirked. A white butterfly landed on his hand, turning black.

"But you will." Before Chat could react, black butterfly landed on his bell. He felt dark power flowing through his body, his strenght increasing. Last tear fell from his eyes. Chat was no longer shaking. His suit was no longer black. His eyes no longer green. Yellow narrowed eyes shone through his white mask.

"Perfect..." he heard Hawk's voice, as calm as always. "Now, Chat Blanc. Bring me mira..." metal staff cut the air just above Hawk's arm, digging into the wall behind him.

"Thank you, Hawk Moth" Chat almost _purred_ those words. This purr wasn't pleasant. Hawk almost could _touch_ the rage hidden behind this purr.

Chat laid Ladybug down and kissed the top of her head.

"Wait for me, my Lady" he whispered into her hair. "I'll be back soon." Chat left her as he approached Hawk Moth.

"Now I can rip you to pieces" Chat growled and jumped at Hawk Moth. He will put the end on this. For his Lady.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this one is so freaking long, full of grammar and spelling mistakes as I was too lazy to read it again to check for them. Unbeta-ed. Weird. And cheesy. Plagg would be proud of how cheesy this came out.
> 
> Also, I have no idea how does a person stutter in English, so Marinette's stuttering may be weird. More than usual.
> 
> English is my second language, so if you notice any mistakes please write them in comments. That would help me a lot.
> 
> Don't own Miraculous Ladybug and it's characters, sakura-rose12's comic as well.

Marinette's eyelids were too heavy to open. She felt so weak. She coldn't see where she was, didn't know if she was safe. The last thing she could remember was her fighting against Hawk Moth along with Chat Noir...

Chat! Where he was!? Was he okay!?

Marinette couldn't move a muscle. All she was able to do was to lay on this surprisingly comfortable ber, in a room that smelled of medics, cheese, chocolate and a smell she haven't smelt before. It wasn't familiar, yet it made her feel at ease. It was nice. Soothing.

Through her closed eyes Marinette could tell the room was dark. She assumed it was night time. She could also tell that she wasn't using her Ladybug's magic. On her stomach she could feel two tiny beings. They felt kind of like Tikki when she was laying on her stomach, taking a nap. Memories of those times seemed so distant. But...

Why two weights?

Suddenly Marinette heard the door open and steps. Whoever came into the room was wandering around for a moment, then steps started approaching her. Her body stifftened on instinct.

"Tikki, Plagg, you two should get some sleep" a voice. Chat's voice. So he was fine. He saved her.

He knew who Marinette was.

Two tiny creatures left their spot on her stomach. They were too exausted to object. Marinette felt the mattress bent as Chat sat on it. His ungloved hand caressed her cheek. It was so warm and gentle.

"My Lady, when will you wake up?" he sounded so sad. So... broken. She couldn't bear hearing his usually bubbly voice being like this. It took all her strenght and will power to crack her eyes open.

Chat saw her move. She could feel the mattres move as he changed his position.

"Marinette? Please be awake" she was finally able to see her surroundings. It was night time indeed, a small lamp on a nightstand being the only source of light. In this dim light Marinette noticed a blond hair, underneath them pair of tired green eyes, still filled with hope and relieve, and then she knew that she was looking at Chat Noir's face.

At Adrien's face.

 

* * *

 

It turned out Adrien did his best to help her. She had bruises and cuts from her fight with Hawk Moth, some deep cuts after hitting the glass and a fractured leg as a result of her fall. Her body hurt, but somewhere in mind she knew it would have been a lot worse. The pain, her leg, everything. It was Adrien who took her unconscious body away from Hawk's hideout. It was Adrien who took her to his home to treat her wounds. It was Adrien who got her injuries treaten by a doctor, making sure he did his job without asking questions. She was safe thanks to Adrien. Thanks to _her_ _Chat Noir._

Marinette wondered if that heat on her face was a blush or if she started getting a fever.

She took a quick glance at Adrien, not having the courage to look at her arm he was currently working on. He was changing her bandage covering particular big, ugly wound. Hoping it wouldn't leave a scar on girl's light skin. Marinette still was so pale, save for her pink face. The doctor said she might be feverish for a few days, due to her bloodlose and broken leg.

Marinette whimpered when Adrien accidentally squeezed her injuried arm with a bandage. The boy started stuttering apology and loose the bandage slightly. Carefully he laid girl's arm on her stomach, wondering what should he do next. Should he act as if nothing happened and they knew each other identities long ago, or try to apologize for letting her get hurt and discovering her identity. Should he act like Adrien, or rather like Chat Noir. Should he treat her as Ladybug, parisian hero, or like Marinette, a shy but talented girl from his class.

Marinette tried to touch her injuried arm with other hand, hissing in pain as she did.

"Want me to kiss it better, my Lady?" _smooth Adrien. Really smooth._ He wanted to hit himself. To his surprise, Marinette started giggling weakly.

"No need to kitty. I'll be fine now." Adrien felt his face heat up at her calling him kitty. It wasn't new, Ladybug used to call him that for a while, but now it was her civilian self saying that. And it felt kind of... _weird._ Not in unpleasant way.

"I'm sorry, Marinette. I failed. It's all my fault. I should have been faster, it should have been me to take that hit, I should have protected you..." Adrien's mind _yelled_ to stop, his mouth wasn't listening. The boy started stuttering, mumbling, tears appeared in his green eyes. He didn't deserve to be Chat Noir. He shouldn't be picked to be Ladybug's sidekick, he couldn't even do his job well.

"Adrien" Marinette's voice was so quiet, so _delicate._ That haven't stopped him from talking.

_"Adrien"_ words flowed out of his mouth, apologizing for everything that happened to her because of his own weakness.

_"Chat Noir!"_ Marinette brought her wounded arm to Adrien's face, trying to catch his attention. Her calling him by his superhero name worked, his mouth got shut. Ignoring pain in her arm Marinette wiped tears from his cheek. Adrien never noticed he started crying. All feelings that bundled up in him started coming out with his tears.

"I could have lost you" he whined between his sobs. That fight, her injury, waiting for her to wake up for few days, not being able to get enough sleep at night, crying himself to sleep next to her bed. It all was nerve-wrecking. It was just too much for him to put up a facade of strong, cocky Chat or distant, collected Adrien. Now he was his true self: the one that was scared to death about loosing his beloved Lady.

Marinette petted his fluffy hair with her uninjured hand. "I'm fine Adrien. Thanks to you"

"I almost lost you" the boy wailed, tears flowing from his eyes. Marinette gave a surprised gasp when Adrien buried his face in the crook of her neck, his sobs muffled. His wails became incoherent mix of ' _I almost lost you', 'I'm sorry', 'it should have been me', 'please don't leave me'_ and ' _I love you'._ Marinette's heart skipped a beat at the first _I love you_ that came from Adrien. Soon enough, she was hugging him awkwardly with one arm, the boy careful not to put all his weight on his Lady's injuried body.

Marinette placed a butterfly kiss on boy's forehead, her fingers tangled in blond locks in soothing manner. If Adrien wasn't so occupied with crying, he was sure his cat insicts would kick in and he would purr. She stayed still, even if the position hurt her she wasn't showing it, not wanting to spoil the moment. Marinette just let Adrien lay his head on her shoulder, listening to his hiccups and quiet sobs, allowing him to listen to her heartbeat. The sound was soothing. Relieving.

 

* * *

 

After hugging and crying session Adrien, pink on face, went to get Marinette, who's face probably was darker shade of red than her superhero costume, something to eat. Not realising that hey, they were at his home, he finally could make a good use of all those servants and cooks his father was hiring and request a meal for his Lady, the boy went to the kitchen himself and started preparing a simple porrige, having in mind that she hadn't eaten in few days so he couldn't give her anything too extravagant. Ignoring cooks, who tried to help him, or even to do the task for him.

After all, it was his job to prepare a meal for his girl...

A spoon Adrien was stirring inside the pot fell to the floor. He almost called Marinette his _girlfriend._ Only in his mind, but that wasn't an excuse. He did.

Sure, in the heat of the moment, when he was so overjoyed that she woke up he _did_ told her he loved her. But Marinette never said anything back. She haven't pushed him away, too, does that count as an answer?

Adrien yelped in surprise when one of the cooks came to shake him out of his train of thoughts when the porridge started to boil.

 

* * *

 

As he came back to his room, Marinette somehow managed to sit on the bed, pillow behind her back as a support. On her lap there were two kwamis, one bright red with antennas, one pitch black with cat-like ears. Tikki's eyes were puffed, showing that she was crying just a moment ago. Plagg's short arm was wrapped in odd manner around her, it looked almost like he wanted to comfort female kwami.

As he spotted Adrien, Plagg flew in his direction, stopping exactly infront of his face.

"Have you brought cheese? Marinette needs cheese! It'l help her in healing!" the black kwami scanned tray Adrien was holding. After spotting no cheese, Plagg started throwing a tantrum about Adrien forgetting it.

"Sorry about him" Adrien smiled at Marinette as he placed the tray on her lap. The porridge smelled delicious.

"It's fine, he's quite cute" the girl smiled back before grabbing the spoon and digging in.

"Careful, it's warm" Adrien mocked her after she took a sip and winced at how hot the porridge was. Plagg continued whining in the background.

"I think you should bring him so cheese before someone will hear him" Marinette said in-between full-spoons of porridge.

"He knows where the kitchen is. It wouldn't be the first time for him to sneak in there" Adrien had to help her balance the tray on her lap, as Marinette could use only one hand. Tikki watched in silence as the girl ate. She shuddered when Adrien carefully petted her head.

"Hey, everything's fine?" the boy asked.

"We told her about your fight with Hawk Moth" with that, the red kwami flew up from the bed and joined Plagg on his way to the kitchen. By the sound of her voice Adrien could say that they haven't told whole truth. Most likely, they haven't told Marinette about Chat Noir turning into Akuma.

Marinette stopped eating, looking expectantly at Adrien. Well, he had to tell her the full story. No matter how bad it was.

 

* * *

 

Adrien kind of regretted asking Marinette to finish her meal before he started telling her whole story. She downed the bowl in few big gulps and he had to look for a water in panic when she choked. She needed to know. _Now_.

It was obvious to her that Plagg and Tikki were hiding something from her. And, apperantely, Adrien was supposed to tell her whole story. She couldn't wait, even burning throat wasn't enough to stop her. However... She had to. Adrien looked like he was searching for right words to say. Like he didn't knew where to start.

"Adrien..."

"Hawk Moth wanted to use me" the boy blurted out, even before he could think what he was saying. Marinette's already big eyes widened.

"He... After he hit you, I... I didn't knew what to do. All I could think about was that I failed to protect you... And that I couldn't let him hurt you more. I wasn't really paying attention and one of his butterflies... it landed on my bell. Hawk Moth changed me into his Akuma"

"I could think straight, I had control over myself, over my mind and body. He... he told me to bring him your miraculous. I attacked him. We started fight, I felt so powerful... I knew some of that power came from Akuma, and that I shouldn't use it, but... I couldn't. If that was what I needed to protect you, then I would use it. I couldn't hear Plagg anymore. I wasn't paying attention wherever I was only hurting Hawk Moth, or trying to... kill him. I couldn't stand that he hurt you. He had to suffer. It was all I could think about"

"As I kept attacking him... It was becoming worse. I didn't knew what was I doing. I couldn't stop myself. I wasn't controled by Hawk Moth, but I wasn't controling myself either. I don't know how I defeated him. I don't know how I defeated the Akuma inside my bell. I don't even know if it's not still there" Adrien brought his hand up to his collar, almost expecting to feel the cold metal of his bell. Marinette stayed silent, not even looking at the boy. They have never seen anyone break down Hawk's spell, let alone use it to fight him, and she didn't know if that was possible for Chat to purify the butterfly. Marinette was weak, she doubted she could turn into Ladybug in her state, so checking out if the Akuma was still there or not by using Chat Noir's power wasn't wise idea. If something went wrong there would be no one to stop him. Tikki and Plagg went somewhere – probably to the kitchen – and so she couldn't ask if Chat Noir was capable of purifying Akumas. If he was, Plagg would teach him that long time ago. Probably.

Adrien's face lightened slightly.

"Well, Plagg said he was fine and that they couldn't sense any Akumas nearby, so maybe I'm fine" there was a hope in his voice.

"I guess we'll just have to wait until I'll get better to see what's going on" Marinette smiled at Adrien, hoping her smile would solace him.

"By the way, how long have I been sleeping?" there wasn't any calendar or anything for Marinette to check the date. It was dark outside, but since servants were still working it couldn't be that late. They were fighting with Hawk Moth in daylight, she could recall it was around noon. That would make her sleep for a few hours at most. In her state it would be best to stay for night, but she needed to call her parents to announce them she was staying at friend's.

"Well... It's been three days. Almost four" Marinette's already pale face got even more white if possible. She was out for this long? Oh God, what about her parents? Did they knew where she was? And Adrien's father? It's not like the boy could hide battered unconscious girl for so long.

"Relax, your parents and my father know about you being here. I told them you fell down the stairs" well, that wouldn't explain all cuts she was covered in, but knowing her clumsiness it was pretty good explanation "And the doctor said it would be best if they weren't moving you around, so they agreed to let you stay here until you'll wake up" Adrien blushed at this part. He wasn't going to add the part when Marinette's parents said that they were leaving their daughter in her boyfriend's hands, not minding Adrien when he tried to clarify they weren't dating. At least they weren't blaming him for Marinette's 'fall'.

Girl's face felt so hot. Since waking up, it was almost like she couldn't control her blush. Of course, it was bad that she was unconscious for few days. But she was laying unconscious in Adrien's house, in Adrien's bed! It felt so intimate for her. No wonder she was covered with nice smell after she woke up. It was his smell... ♥

"Chat! What about Hawk Moth?" Marinette still needed to get used to this situation. Chat was Adrien. That she already started to accept. But oh god, what if she called him Chat in front of someone?

"Well... I captured him" _after almost killing him_ Adrien thought bitterly "Now he's being held in prison. Major is waiting for you to recover before they'll start his trial" after all, Ladybug and Chat Noir were main witnesses in this case. Adrien wondered how would it look like. How would they check their identity? How long would it take, wouldn't their transformations worn out in the middle of the trial?

"That's... Good"

"It's over, isn't it? This whole superhero thing" Adrien added when Marinette made a puzzled face.

"After this trial... We won't have to be Ladybug and Chat Noir anymore. We will be Marinette and Adrien, normal teenagers... And I don't want this" Adrien took Marinette's petite hand into his bigger one.

"I don't want to us be ordinary Adrien and Marinette. I want us to be ordinary Adrien _and_ Marinette. Together. So..." blush covered boy's face, even his ears turned into lovely shade of red.

"After this all ends... Will you go out with me? Not with Chat Noir, not with Adrien. With _me_ " at first Marinette didn't understand what he meant. Just when she wanted to ask him she _knew_. He didn't wanted her to like him for who he was as Adrien or Chat Noir. He wanted her to accept him for who _he_ was. His eyes were looking directly into hers, firm and confident.

"Yes" proud of herself for not stuttering Marinette couldn't look Adrien in the eye. After all, two boys she had helplessly fell in love with turned out to be one person. And now, that person was asking her out. A little too much for her poor heart. Her mind was racing trying to convince herself that yes, it _was_ true, Adrien _did_ ask her out. She haven't noticed him leaning towards her. A chaste kiss on her forehead woke her up.

"I-i m-mean, yyyes, I w-w-would like t-to" _great_ Marinette thought. _The boy of my dreams asked me out and I decided it was good moment to start stutter. Really great._ She hadn't noticed Adrien's giggle. She hadn't noticed when he leaned _once again._ This time, his lips captured hers.

The kiss was short, unexperienced, but _so_ sweet. Leaving them both blushing. Marinette's heart was beating so fast, her stomach filled with something that felt like butterflies. Adrien flashed her his trademark Chesire grin.

"Cat got your tongue?"

Well, if that was her reaction, it was worth being hit with a pillow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!

**Author's Note:**

> Don't own Miraculous Ladybug and it's characters, sakura-rose12's comic as well.
> 
> Edit: forgot to mention, English is my second language, so there may be mistakes


End file.
